No Boots About It: revised edition
by exdee
Summary: Daria's boots go missing and all of her classmates think she ditched them to fit in better. Meanwhile, she and Jane search for the culprit!


No Boots About It: Chapter One  
  
Daria, Jane, and the rest of the characters included in this fanfic are property of MTV. I did not create these characters, nor did I create Lawndale or Lawndale High.  
  
Scene one: The Morgendorffers' house  
  
Daria awoke on Friday morning to the sound of her beeping alarm clock. "Damn clock...", she muttered before getting out of bed and walking down the hall towards the bathroom. After brushing her teeth and showering, she walked back to her room to change for school.  
  
She put on her usual outfit of a pleated black skirt, yellow-orange shirt, and green jacket when she went to her closet to grab her boots. When she opened the door, she immediately noticed that they weren't there. "Huh, who here would want to take my boots?", she wondered aloud. She ruled out Quinn, who wore very little black, if any at all. Plus, she usually despised anything unfashionable.   
  
She decided to go downstairs and see if her parents knew anything about their whereabouts. She didn't expect much of an answer however, mainly because Jake might be on one of squirrel ranting sprees.   
  
"Mom, Dad, have you seen my boots anywhere? They're not in my closet.", she asked her parents at the breakfast table in her usual monotone.   
  
"Damn squirrels are at it again! First it's trash, then it's shoes, what's next... cars?! I swear, I'll catch those damn rodents... why, they're nothing but rats with fluffy tails!", Jake Morgendorffer shouted in reply while standing up and gesturing wildly with his coffee cup.   
  
"Sit down Jake, and take it easy on the caffeine will you?", replied Helen, "Oh look at that, I'm late for my 8 o'clock meeting with Eric. See you at seven sweetie, hope you find your boots!"  
  
Daria gave up and went back to her room to put on a pair of sneakers instead. Damn boots, now everyone's going to think I got rid of them to look more normal. - she thought to herself.   
  
Scene two: Daria and Jane are walking to school.  
  
"Geez Daria, you look almost normal without your boots! Wait a minute, who are you and what have you done with Daria Morgendorffer?" Jane Lane asked in mock-concern. "But really, what do you figure happened to them? Did your dad attempt to make gumbo and needed something to give it that extra kick?"  
  
"Well, I figure either Quinn's gone alternative and rather than buy her own combat boots, she stole mine; or Dad's on the right track with his squirrel theory.", Daria answered in her un-mistakable sarcasm.   
  
"Not much chance of either of those happening any time soon. Did you see Quinn at breakfast?"  
  
"No, she was probably still feeding her black cats and repairing her broomstick from last night's ride with the rest of the Fashion Club."  
  
"Hmm, who could it be then? We may just have a case of Upchuck with an odd, never before revealed, foot fetish. Or, it could just be the aliens again. This time, instead of Artie, they went after you. This might be the perfect time to bust out my finger printing kit!"  
  
"Right, Upchuck broke in to steal my boots, even when he could have taken any or all of Quinn's 100 varieties. And the aliens were going to do what with my boots? Torture the Fashion Club when they're captured perhaps? There's just one problem with finger printing... the evidence is gone."  
  
"Yeah, good point. Well then, do you suggest we get a sample of your foot odor and release the hounds?"  
  
"That could work. Or we could interrogate every innocent person at Lawndale High until we find the guilty party... or get arrested for disturbing the peace."  
  
"Well, I've always wondered what it'd be like to be taken in. Who knows, your boots might be somewhere you wouldn't have even suspected."  
  
Scene three: Lawndale High  
  
Daria and Jane were walking down the hall towards Mr. DeMartino's class when Britany and Kevin approached them with strange looks on their faces, almost as if they were thinking at all.  
  
"Well, if it isn't America's future leaders.", Jane remarked with un-mistakable sarcasm.  
  
"Wow Daria, you almost look normal without those ugly boots! Isn't it weird Kevey?! It's like she's trying to look cooler or something!" exclaimed Britany as Daria and Jane passed her on the way to math.   
  
"Yeah Babe, it's like somebody switched brains with her and made her normal and stuff! Like in that movie we saw Saturday...." Kevin replied.  
  
"It's a relief no one could switch brains with you, isn't it Kevin?", Daria said with obvious sarcasm, which Kevin missed anyway.  
  
As Daria an Jane continued down the hall, Mr. O'Neil spotted them and they realized he had a look on his face similar to that of Britany and Kevin, except his thinking was much less shocking and he also wore a look of puzzlement.   
"Hello Daria, Jane. Why Daria, your not wearing your boots today! It's good that your really beginning to care about how others perceive you. Way to go Daria!", Mr. O'Neil exclaimed with immense cheeriness.   
  
"No, I just can't find them. I still don't care how people perceive me.", Daria replied in an annoyed sort of monotone. I can't believe people think I'm starting to care about how I look, just because I'm not wearing my stupid boots.- thought Daria to herself.  
  
"God Daria, we better get those boots back as quickly as possible... this might ruin your good reputation!", Jane remarked.  
  
"Oh, and you know how I covet my reputation. Do you think there's any chance no one else will notice?", Daria asked, semi-hopefully.  
  
"There's also the chance that Trent may get a job or go to college, but that still doesn't make it likely."  
  
At this point, they entered Mr. DeMartino's classroom and took they're seats. I swear, I'm going to kill whoever took my damn boots in the first place.- thought Daria as she took out her notebook and began doodling.  
  
"Okay, can anyone tell me which war was the one that we fought with the British over our independence?!", asked Mr. DeMartino in his usual loud, angry voice as his right eyeball popped out at intervals. As expected, no one attempted to answer his question. "Very well then. Daria, I assume you know the answer?!"  
  
"That would be the Revolutionary War.", Daria replied in monotone. God, I hope he doesn't say anything about my boots.- she thought to herself.  
  
"Very good, Daria. At least someone in this class is paying attention!", he exclaimed as his eye began madly bulging out.  
  
Thank God, someone who didn't notice my shoes.- she thought. I wonder where they could be though, I mean, who do I know that would want my boots?! Jane did make that comment once about having my boots if I die... stop it, that's a stupid thought! Jane's trying to help, remember?! Throughout the rest of history class, she tried to think of any potential suspects. She could think of no one. 


End file.
